Tuesday, September 15, 2009

Can You Say "Yum"?



This is what I was served when I got home from work today. Can you say "chocolate mousse"? Can you say "yum"? It's my birthday. I'm allowed to go off my diet. My son gave me this handmade rug...



Do you see Lostine, Gabbrielle, and Bombay in there? Monty and Midge too? Here are some other gifts given to me by my family...


Yes, that's more chocolate. That bag is going to last me a while. The wine may be a different story. Unfortunately, I can't have any of it right now, because I came down with the flu on my birthday. Does that suck or what? When I was six years old I came down with the flu on Halloween. That was the end of the world for me. My brother brought home a pillow case filled to the brim with treats and my mother made him give me half, but I was so sick that I couldn't eat any of it for several days.

The biscuit bin is something that my husband picked up for me at an antiques shop. Since we will have more counter space in our new kitchen, he wanted me to have something nice to put on it. We received our estimate for the labor to do the demo and install of our kitchen. $4,000. Yikes. I'm thinking we can do it ourselves. Considering that we still haven't bought a stove and just had to fork out an unexpected vet bill, we don't need any additional expenses.

The lawn gnome is a very special gift from my daughter. The gnome is motion activated to throw insults at the passerby. Our idea is that we can place it at the end of our driveway where our nosy neighbor likes to bring her dog to let it pee and look in my office window while I'm working. My favorite insult is when the gnome farts and says, "Oh man! I held that one in for three hours waiting for someone to show up." He also waves his hand, which can be interpreted as a greeting or as him waving the stink away from him. I can't wait to try him out.

It was a really weird day. I got stuck in traffic behind a car accident. I was late for work, but had to remind myself that I was still having a better day than the people who wrecked their cars. I wasn't feeling well yesterday or today, and one of my symptoms was slurred speech. So, I was sitting in this meeting talking about software versions, but I couldn't say the word "versions" and kept accidentally saying the word "virgins". My coworkers were trying really hard not to laugh, because they knew I couldn't control my speech, which is sad, but it was also funny that the word that kept coming out of my mouth was a sexual reference.

On the way home, I kept getting stuck behind people driving 15 MPH under the speed limit while being passed by people going 15 MPH over the speed limit. I felt like I was driving an obstacle course. I tried to stop for gas, but the gas station was full and vehicles were pouring in from every driveway and moving really fast, so I had to leave before someone hit me. I tried stopping at a store to buy more fence paint, and found the paint, but forgot the paint thinner, which means I have yet another shopping trip in my near future. (Yesterday I went to the store and bought cayenne pepper, but forgot the Vaseline to rub on Gabbrielle's bandage. I also bought hot dog buns, but forgot the turkey dogs to put in them.) Then just now I was burning some candles in glass containers, and one of the candles got so hot that the glass shattered all over the floor and counter top. Fortunately, I heard an odd clinking sound and decided to investigate. Otherwise, the house might have burned down. I'm going to bed now and hoping this weirdness will go away with a new day.

14 comments:

Katharine Swan said...

Oh my -- you and I both had weird days! I got kicked, I almost got run off the road on my way to pick my husband up from work, and one of my collectible dolls decided to spontaneously fall from her shelf. Ugh, I think I need to go to bed, too.

All that aside, though -- happy birthday! I love the rug -- what a thoughtful gift from your son -- and the gnome is freaking awesome. Can't wait to hear whether it works! (Too bad it doesn't come with a spy camera installed in it, too!)

Paint Girl said...

Happy Birthday to you!!!! I am so sorry you came down with the flu on your B-day!!
I love the rug your son got you, and the gnome is awesome! I can't wait to hear how it works with the neighbors!!
Hope you feel better real soon!!

Laura said...

Happy birthday!!! It's my hubby's birthday today and mine is later in the month... Gotta love September birthdays! lol

Sounds like you had some nice gifts from your family - love the gnome! I hope he startles your crazy neighbour...

Fantastyk Voyager said...

Happy Birthday~!~

Looks like you had a nice little birthday party. Can you send me a piece of that cake? YUMMY!!!

Hope everything goes better for you today.

HorseOfCourse said...

HAPPY BIRTHDAY NUZZMUZZ!!!!
Hope both you and Gabbrielle get well soon.
What lovely bithday presents you got.
My favourite was the garden gnome. Could you please hide a camera around it? I would love to see your nosy neighbour's look when it farts, ROFL!

HorseOfCourse said...

...and the handmade rug too. What a fantastic idea. Your children have really found something out of the ordinary!

Sydney said...

Happy birthday! The rug is cute but that gnome! I want one!

Callie said...

Happy Birthday! Wow! What great gifts, the rug is adorable!

Laughing Orca Ranch said...

Happy Birthday, NM! You deserve a wonderful birthday.

That rug is amazing. I sure hope it's going on a wall or being made into a pillow instead of being trodden upon. It's very special! :) And that gnome cracks me up. I'd love to have a hidden camera set up for when your neighbors walk by and it farts at them or says shocking things. lol!

Of course, just imagining you sayin 'Virgins' in a board metting cracks me up!

My husband missed my birthday for the first time in 19 years. I didn't get anything except a robe from my parents and had to buy my own cake. My birthday kind of sucked except for spending time letterboxing with my kidlets.

You got some great gifts. Sorry about the weird day. Some days are just like that, you know. I hope you feel better soon.


~Lisa

Julie G said...

You and my husband both share the same birthday... his day was full of traffic "almost" catastrophies but none the less it ended safely... however today he is in the hospital for surgery.... that was his only b-day wish... surgery to fix his back. Now he is in a lot of pain! Be careful what you wish for... hope you're feeling better soon.

Andrea said...

Happy Birthday!! Oh it looks like you had a wonderful little party! That cake...oh my goodness looked sooo gooooood!!!! And that rug! WOW!! Did your son handmake that our did he have someone make that? Either way, it's awesome. I love the horses and your dogs!! It's just too cute!! I love it.

And when I saw that gnome I just started to laugh! I knew exactly where he was going to go!! LOL!!

Sounds like the end of the day was just strange....with the drivers, the forgetting of everything. What a day!

Once Upon an Equine said...

Happy Birthday! You got great gifts and that cake looks fabulous. Birthday cake has zero calories, you know.

Breathe said...

ROFL! I can't wait to hear how that Gnome works. Happy, happy birthday!

KD said...

Happy belated birthday ! That WAS a weird day. :-)