Monday, January 16, 2012

What Happened to the Holiday?

Seriously, I'm starting to think that holidays should be banned.  First off, when I was working outside the home, the companies I worked for rarely let me actually take holidays off from work, so I've never benefited from them.  However, all the people you need on holidays, like vets and plumbers, do take their holidays, so you can't get any service.  If you have an emergency and have to run to the hardware store to fix it, you're out of luck on a holiday.

Martin Luther King Jr. Day was such a blitz for me.  I can't even remember all of the insanity that occurred, but I'll try.

1.  Washed dishes, started the laundry and then attempted to re-grout the shower yet again.

2.  While waiting for the laundry to finish and the grout to dry, taped off the crown and floor molding in the master bathroom so I could start painting.  I thought it was safe to start such a labor-intensive project on a holiday since no one would be calling me and dragging me off in some different direction.

3.  While doing that, the hay farmer called and asked me to come over to his farm to decide on which hay I want to order, since all the alfalfa/grass mix is either inaccessible, unavailable or poor quality.  I was like, "Really?  I've called you three times over the past two weeks, even told you this was a bad week for me, so we had to do this last week, and you end up calling me on a holiday that I set aside to do home improvement tasks.  Really?  Could your timing be any worse?"

4.  Noticed that my neighbors' garbage blew over in yesterday's wind again, and ran outside to pick all their garbage off my property.

5.  While doing that I caught Bombay trying to break the deicer in the water trough, so I had to run over there to fill it up all the way with water.

6.  Drove over to the hay farm and looked at last year's 1st crop of grass with seed heads, 2nd crop of grass, and some alfalfa with just a little bit of grass mixed in.  I decided to go for the alfalfa since it is easier to keep a horse fat on one slice of that than grass.  I'll just have to ease it into their diet.  The hay farmer made me pay more than he promised last September, but I didn't complain since these bales were different and since other people were paying $5 to $7 more a bale at the feed store.  Then the hay farmer tried to talk me down from 84 bales to 64, and I was like, "No way.  I barely have enough to last until the first cutting.  I need the full block."  We argued over when he could deliver.  Of course, he wanted to deliver right when I'd have clients over at my house doing a photo shoot, and their vehicles would be blocking him from delivering the hay.  I had to insist that he bring the block by today.  He kept talking and wouldn't shut up and it was freezing cold outside and I didn't bring my jacket.  Then some cowboy swaggered up and kept smiling at me and I had to look at the ground to be polite to my husband.  By the way, are you watching that dating show called "Sweet Home Alabama?"  Lots of cowboys.  ; )  (Insert my Beavis and Butthead laugh here.)

7.  Got home and ate lunch two hours late.

8.  Tried to finish taping off the bathroom molding when something kept dripping on my head.  Discovered that the toilet tank was leaking.  Tried to fix it by tightening the screw, but my husband yelled at me to stop, because I would break the porcelain.  I stopped, but it was too late.  Water was now pouring out of the tank onto the floor.  Husband caught it in a bucket, turned off the water valve, removed the nuts, bolts and seals, cleaned them off, inspected the tank, and managed to repair the leak.  Our son called right when the water was pouring onto the floor, so we had to ask him to call back later.  I think I caused the leak by leaning on the tank to tape the crown molding.

9.  My husband informed me that Bombay had the fits and was racing around snorting and rearing.  I decided to get his ya-yas out and exercise all the horses by chasing them around with a whip, but my annoying neighbor had to ruin it by driving up to the fence to watch, which distracted the horses and they were more concerned about the truck with its engine idling and the strange man staring at them than they were about me and my whip, so I gave up and went back inside.

10.  All this time I was running between the garage and our closet to cycle and hang laundry.

11.  Realized that it was going to get dark soon and I hadn't cleaned stalls in two days.  Raced outside to try to get that done, but before I could clean half a stall, the hay farmer arrived with my block of alfalfa.  I had to put down my fork to help him back it up.  He kept yakking while the sun was setting and again I got caught outside in freezing temps, held hostage by the hay farmer's gift of gab.  He looked at my annoying neighbors' junk yard with disgust and said, "How're the old folks doing?"  I said, "They're a pain in the ass as always."  He agreed.

He pointed out that my annoying neighbors started working on re-roofing their barn three years ago and still aren't done.

I told him he didn't need to tell me about it... and it's actually been five years since they started that project.

Gabbrielle kept trying to eat my hay fork, so I threw some rocks at the barn to chase her off, but she just stared at me.  The hay farmer said, "Boy, I'd hate to make you angry."

My husband was on top of the haystack yelling something at me, but I couldn't hear, because the hay farmer wouldn't shut up.  I could tell by the urgency in my husband's voice that something was wrong.  They hay farmer kept talking right over him, so I yelled at him and said, "I have to go!  I think my husband is stuck.  He needs help."  I ran off to find the new haystack teetering dangerously, while he was trying to knock some of the bales down.  It turned out that he was just warning me to stay out of the way, because it was ready to collapse.

12.  Once we got the hay re-stacked and covered, I had to finish cleaning stalls, feeding and blanketing the horses.  Each time I'd finish cleaning one stall, some horse would sneak in and take a dump, so the cleaning was taking forever.  The horses were pooping faster than I could clean, so I gave up.

13.  I started dinner, and heard a fire engine siren stop nearby.  I thought, "Oh no!  I forgot that our manure pile was burning."  It's had smoke rising from it for the past two days and I've been meaning to douse it with water and turn it.  Then my husband came running out of the bathroom saying that a UFO landed in our back yard, because a red light was flashing through the bathroom window.

We ran outside to find several fire trucks and police cars at the new neighbor's rental house.  They've only been living there a few days and already had to call 911.  I don't know what was going on.  I just wanted to finish my dinner. 

Maybe my annoying neighbor was peeping in their windows and they called out the entire county to catch her, thinking she was Bigfoot.  I had the "Finding Bigfoot" series showing on the TV all day while I was running around, and I caught a few glimpses of it here and there, so I've got Bigfoot on the brain.  I need to get some sleep.  I'm getting loopy.  Nighty night.


Trainwreck said...

Wow if that's how you spend your holidays I wouldn't want to have but 1every once in awhile!! Lol its amazing to me you had enough energy to write a post about it??!!

Crystal said...

Wow its not a holiday up in Canada, but its so cold out I havent left the house except to feed the cats.

Dreaming said...

ROFL - your day got better and better.... from the POV of this reader! I'm sure it was funny from your end of things, though!
I've had days somewhat like this, where I think I'm a chicken with my head cut off, running from one thing to another and never quite finishing what I set out to do.
Hopefully tomorrow... when the holiday is over... will be more restful!

Cut-N-Jump said...

I hope at least one or two things got done and the project completed. At least the neighbors house wasn't burning down.

Our hay guy stacks the hay and we help him if we are here. He is awesome(!) and I didn't complain even when he stacked it right in front of the shop doors making things inside almost inaccessable. It was my fault we weren't here when he showed up, to show him where to put it so nobody to blame but myself on that one...

Go bigfoot! Gotta look for the other series. I likes me the look of a cowboy.

Laughing Orca Ranch said...

Wow! What a doozie of a day! Isn't that the way it always is, You start a project and then cause or discover a problem with something else, and then you never are able to finish the original job?

Distractions can drive a person crazy...but least you've finally got that project accomplished :)


Mikey said...

Wow. Just WOW.

achieve1dream said...

I'll be back to catch up asap, but wanted to respond to your comment on my racehorse blog post. The cigarette and cigar smoke was horrible!! I kept holding my jacket over my face to filter the air so I could breathe but I still ended up with a massive headache. And yes there was trash everywhere. People are so inconsiderate and dumb. Luckily since we went on a day they are not normally open (since it was a holiday) it wasn't that busy. If we got in place ten minutes before each race we could get a great spot on the rail right by the starting gates or finish line. There was also a sort of balcony that was perfect for getting shots over people's heads if we zoomed in. It was so cool being so close to them though. :D Thanks for your comment!

achieve1dream said...

Good grief! What a day!