Tuesday, December 2, 2014

Text Humor

This has nothing to do with horses, but I find it rather humorous.  A while back I started getting text messages from a stranger who obviously had the wrong number.  The messages were always insulting, usually addressing me (or really the person she thought she was texting) as the B-word.  (Think female dog.)

At first I ignored them, but after a while I took the time to respond and let her know she had the wrong number.  She must have thought I was kidding, because she continued to text me and call me the B-word.  I got tired of it and told her to remove my number from her contact list and never text me again.

The messages stopped... for a while.  Then they started up again.  They seem to go in cycles and be particularly active around the holidays.  Each time the text messages start pouring in, I have to remind her that she has the wrong number.  Sometimes she believes me, sometimes not.

It's funny, because she always starts out being verbally abusive, calling the recipient names, but in a joking manner.  When she gets no response, she softens up and calls her "Bunny."  If I ignore her long enough, I start getting messages at 3:00 in the morning pleading for her to answer.  That's usually that last straw and I have to demand that she get rid of my number.  Unfortunately, I don't have a smart phone, so I can't block her.

Here's the latest thread:

Fwd: Danny  Fwd:  1234 Street Name, City, State, Zip
(She sent me Danny's address, which I am not including here, because I don't want to get sued.)
(B-word) heard you made my favorite coconut cream .send me one!!!
(Punctuation and grammar are hers.)
(This was followed up with a photo of a chubby little boy eating a popsicle.)
(Danny's address is sent a second time.)
Danny address
I sent you this dummy. Don't send him weed in his cookies.
(Danny's address is sent a third time along with his phone number.)
(Danny's phone number is sent a second time.)
(Suddenly my phone number shows up -- meaning that this message was addressed to me.) sorry that you were nuts
(All previous messages were then forwarded to the correct person, but I was cc'd on it, so I had to listen to more dinging from my phone.)

I thought it was funny that she said, "sorry that you were nuts" as opposed to "sorry I drove you nuts."  All I could figure out was that I must have said in one of my previous cease and desist messages that she was driving me nuts.

After the comment about the weed, I was tempted to respond, telling her that she just sent Danny's address and phone number to a complete stranger, and now I am going to notify the police that there might be marijuana located at that address.  I don't mean to be cruel, but I had asked the girl multiple times to delete and throw away any reference to my phone number so that she wouldn't find it in the future and keep texting me, thinking she was texting someone else.  I knew there had to be some agonizing consequence for her in order to get her off her duff and find every instance of my phone number in her records to get rid of it.  Most people won't make the effort to correct a problem unless they are inconvenienced by it themselves.

In this case, I think I own the phone number that the person she was trying to contact had at one time, because the final phone number she forwarded everything to wasn't even close.  It was a completely different area code and everything.  So, it wasn't like a couple of numbers happened to just get flipped or one number was misheard or typed in incorrectly.  It was as if someone used to have my number, and then moved and got a new number.

Boy!  It feels like Alaska in Arizona today.  Dark, cloudy, and icy.  Looks like California is getting hammered.  Hope this puts a dent in their drought.


achieve1dream said...

LOL!!! She must have your number saved in her address book under the same name as the other one. In my phone you can have three numbers under one name; a home, cell and work number. When I click it the three numbers pop up and I have to choose one. I bet she just hasn't bothered to edit it and keeps choosing the wrong number and then every text after that is sent as a reply to her first message so she's not even seeing the number, only the name. Lazy woman!! I would probably send the weed message to get her attention. As funny as it is that would get annoying.

Venom said...

I think I would actually take the time to phone her directly. Odds are that if you talk to her, or leave her a voice message, she'd finally understand that she's wasting her time!