So much ridiculousness took place this past weekend. I'm still trying to process it all. Here are some highlights:
1. Was planning to take a guided educational hike, but got hit with a health ailment that requires medication to control, and ran out of the medication. Jumped through hoops to get the meds in time to take the hike, only to find out that the activity was sold out and I couldn't participate anyway.
2. Of my three manure forks, two broke beyond repair on the same day and the third required repairs. "No problem," I thought. "I'll just pick up one of those forks I've been admiring for months at the feed store." I drove to the feed store only to find out that they sold all the good ones and just brought in a shipment of cruddy ones I won't use. I jumped for joy to find one fork left that was a kind I like, only to discover that it was broken. Lesson learned: Buy everything I might need for the future before the snowbirds arrive. I ended up bulk ordering a bunch of fork heads online, but have to wait two weeks for them to be delivered.
3. By eating in a restaurant after the lunch hour, we were able to get a seat, but had to wait for the dishes to be washed before we could be served what we ordered.
4. Falling down hurts more on the third day after the fall than the first or second. You learn that you fell on body parts you thought were unaffected.
5. Someone finally inquired about Gabbrielle after me having her on the market for several months and dropping her price down below what I paid for her. The lady was anxious to come see her, only to suddenly have an inexplicable change of heart a few hours later after I gave her my address and set up a time. She didn't ask any questions about the horse, so I know it wasn't anything I said about Gabbrielle. She just said, "I think now may not be the right time for me after all." Impending impulsive purchase guilt?
Oh well, I suppose that's better than her waiting until after I've bathed the horse and rode her in my painful, bruised condition to tell me she changed her mercurial mind.
6. The fastest way to settle a bunch of ornery horses down is to have the temperatures shoot up from the 50s into the 80s overnight. A little bit of heat, and suddenly everyone remembers their basic education and manners.
7. Never tell a drunken neighbor who has raced back and forth in front of your house all day and night in a souped-up, loud golf cart that he has to stop doing it, especially after his team loses the Super Bowl.
Okay, this one is worth elaborating on. We have this neighbor who threw a Super Bowl party, and he had to take each of his guests for a spin in his outrageously loud, golf cart/dune buggy thingy. He even allowed some of them to drive the cart themselves. Of course, all of these people were drunk and rambunctious, so they were drag racing back and forth in front of my house. I had to keep turning up the volume so I could hear my TV. I tried to be patient, even though this guy ruined our Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Years, and everything in between by doing the same thing. I knew Superbowl Sunday couldn't last forever, and at some point he'd put the vehicle away and go to bed.
The drivers quickly bored of racing up and down the street, and soon began tearing up the plants and animal habitats along the shoulder of the road. They'd go so fast that the cart would hit a ditch and get airborne. We had to listen to the engine roaring and people screaming for hours. I finally pulled out my video camera and recorded it, figuring I'd eventually get a wreck on video, or at least have evidence should we have to get the police and courts involved.
Technically, they were tearing up our land and the land belonging to the property that I manage next door. I was getting pissed because they were creating a turnout in front of my house by smashing down all the shrubs, and the last thing I want is a bunch of drivers pulling U-turns in front of my house because these jerks blazed a trail there. I got fed up and went outside to tell them to stop, but they disappeared before I reached the front yard.
We thought they were done with their rampage, but then we heard the engine heading back up the hill toward us around 8:30 PM. This time they were turning around at the end of our driveway repeatedly, and each time they did that, they were shining their headlights into the windows of our house and disrupting our privacy as well as our peace and quiet. Just as I was reaching for the phone to call the police, my husband marched outside and told the guy to cut it out.
I didn't see or hear what happened, but my husband came back in the house and said that neighbor was the rudest man he's ever met. He called my husband a weirdo for standing in front of our house at night and waving them down to point out that the man was causing a problem. A short time after that, close to 9:00 PM, our doorbell rang. My husband answered cordially, even though it was a ridiculous hour to be calling on someone, and even though the guy ignored my sign on the door that specifically says not to ring the doorbell or knock because of excitable dogs.
The dogs were lunging at the door barking and all of the sudden I heard this explosion of angry voices on the porch. The voices were so enraged that the dogs shut up and ran to hide. I got scared thinking that this neighbor was going to do something violent to my husband. My husband kept opening the door from the outside trying to get back into the house, and I'd catch a few words here and there.
Basically, the guy came to our house to call my husband a bunch of nasty names and insult him. He didn't come over to work things out. He was trying to pick a fight. My husband told him he was calling the police and the guy said, "Good! Call them. They'll just tell you that you don't own the street."
My husband got back in the house and locked the door before fists began hitting faces, and I could hear the guy out there on our doorstep still yelling. It was scary. He did go away, and he did stop racing that thing back and forth in front of our house and tearing up the vegetation on our property, so we didn't call the police, but it was a sleepless night. The dogs were growling at every little noise outside, and I kept going out to make sure the man wasn't vandalizing our house or hurting my horses. At one point I smelled smoke and thought he was setting our house on fire, but it must have been someone burning a bonfire.
In the morning I took pictures of the destruction caused by this neighbor and his party guests driving that vehicle on our land. Then, almost as if by miracle, the postal carrier accidentally delivered one piece of junk mail to our house that had this neighbor's name on it (something he's never done before), and I was able to research him on the Internet. Turns out he's from Salt Lake City and is a card carrying member of the LDS church. Can you believe it?
Love they neighbor. Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.
Why do I always get the winners?
All we can do is hope that the man was so embarrassed over his actions from the previous night when he awoke the next morning that he'll stay clear of us and restore our peace.